Twist of Fate – Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers

FLASH FICTION FOR ASPIRING WRITERS – 12 March 2015

Twist of Fate

Leonie rested her elbows on the railing and took in the breathtaking beauty and serenity of her surroundings.  She watched the waves lap against the side of the boat, the sing-song lullaby almost sending her to sleep.

Suddenly, a noise from behind.  Leonie tensed.  A heavy hand pressed down on her shoulder.  Startled, she twisted to the right, using all her strength to drive her elbow in deep.  Without a second thought, she grabbed her assailant by the shirt, dragged him to the side of the boat and pushed him into the water.

Blood-red rose petals rippled across the lake as the $3000 engagement ring sunk into the murky depths below.

Bryce broke through the icy cold water and shouted in disbelief, “What the hell!”

“That’ll teach you to sneak up on me!” she shouted back.  (137 words)

Thanks to Cat for the lovely photo that inspired me to write a flash fiction story.  Each week a photo is posted on the Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers blog and writers are challenged to create a 100-150 word story, (give or take 25 words), based on the photo. Have a look at their website for more information and join in the fun!

If you have any suggestions on how I can improve my story, please feel free to comment 🙂

Advertisements

20 thoughts on “Twist of Fate – Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers

    • Yeah, writing flash fiction is a lot of fun. Hope you can join in the fun. I was just trying to add a link to my blog from the flash fiction site but don’t think it worked and then I ended up in Twitter – think I may have tweeted it?? Goodness what a mess! haha.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Well, Leonie doesn’t take surprises well! Poor Bryce (clearly there’s more he needs to learn about Leonie).

    It’s great that she knows how to protect herself (strong, fast, quick-thinker, resourceful), but I can’t help but wonder what happened to her to make her automatically assume she was in danger. And was she still reeling in too much adrenaline to apologize at the end (not for the ring she didn’t know about, but just throwing Bryce overboard)?

    Wonderful and smart choice of descriptions! I’m so intrigued

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Leonie doesn’t react well to getting a fright! Because she was caught up in the beauty of the lake, she lost track of time so wasn’t expecting Bryce to be back yet. Then when she heard someone approaching but they didn’t call out or say ‘hello’ she started to panic. And of course, when the person touched her shoulder she felt that she had to defend herself, so she tossed them overboard! At that moment she was still too angry to apologise to Bryce.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Excellent. I loved this. Are you trying to add the blue button to your post? The directions I gave you was to add the blue button. You paste the code into the html side of your post. Then the blue button automatically shows up.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, please delete it. It’s not supposed to be there. I was trying to get the froggy link onto my blog and it didn’t work and then I clicked on the twitter link. I’ve only just joined twitter so have no idea what I’m doing!! Thanks.

      Like

  3. Excellent twist. I loved your descriptions of the serenity of being on the boat.
    I know a couple who met when he tapped her on the shoulder from behind to ask the time and she, a judo black-belt, threw him to the ground out of reflex. Your story reminded me of that 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  4. A very well written story, with plenty of tension and lovely descriptive phrases. I particularly like the waves lapping the side of the boat (hull) with a sing-song melody and the blood red petals across the water as the ring disappears. Leonie’s skill in martial arts is impressive and works really well before the amusing twist at the end. Nicely done. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

Go on... Tell me what you think...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s